"I am sadly concerned that thousands of mothers are so over-burdened that the actual demands of life from day to day consume all their time and strength. But of two evils, choose the lesser: which would you call the lesser--an unpolished stove or an untaught boy? Dirty windows, or a child whose confidence you have failed to gain? Cobwebs in the corner, or a son over whose soul a crust has formed, so strong that you despair of melting it with your hot tears and fervent prayers?
I have seen a woman who was absolutely ignorant of her children's habits of thought, who never felt that she could spare a half-hour to read or talk with them--I have seen this woman spend ten minutes in ironing a sheet, or forty minutes icing a cake for tea, because company was expected.
When the mother, a good orthodox Christian, shall appear before the Great White Throne to be judged for the "deeds done in the body," and to give her report of the master's treasures placed in her care, there will be questions and answers like these:
"Where are the boys and girls I gave thee?"
"Lord, I was busy keeping my house clean and in order, and my children wandered away."
"Where wert thou while thy sons and thy daughters were learning lessons of dishonesty, malice and impurity?"
"Lord, I was polishing furniture and making beautiful rugs."
"What hast thou to show for thy life's work?"
"The tidiest house, Lord, and the best starching and ironing in all our neighborhood!"
Oh these children, these children! The restless eager boys and girls whom we love more than our lives! Shall we devote our time and strength to that which perishes while the rich garden of our child's soul lies neglected, with foul weeds choking out all worthy and beautiful growths? Fleeting indeed, O mother, are the days of childhood, and speckless windows, snowy linen, the consciousness that everything about the house is faultlessly bright and clean will be poor comfort in that day wherein we shall discover that our poor boy's feet have chosen the path that shall take him out of the way to all eternity."--Author Unknown
I came across this anonymous letter to Elizabeth Elliot when I was searching for advice on how to maintain an orderly home and homeschool at the same time. As our family grows I feel like it is constant work to keep our house in order. There are days that I spend cleaning our house just for it to become dirty again the next day and it feels like all my efforts are in vain... I have to (and want to) maintain some standards of cleanliness but at the same time I don't want cleaning to be the primary focus of my days and in the meantime having my kids running around unattended. It seems like putting a lot of energy into something that doesn't have any eternal value. I know I have written on this subject before, but I am still trying to find the balance...I'm up for any suggestions:)
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5 comments:
To me the hardest thing was finding the balance!! Yikes, we all experience that as women forever, I think. Taking advantage of times when they are happily occupied to scurry around and get a load of clothes in, a floor swept, a dish washed...then when they are clammoring, to sit with them and read a book, use a teachable moment. I think it is about not getting overwhelmed with the whole job but the parts we CAN do in small moments. I learned that over many years when I would toss it all because I didn't know how to do part. You are such a great mom and they will remember the beautiful moments you spend with them.
This is a constant prayer for me.
Often, I do follow my children's leadings and if one asks me to read a story, for example, I remember that a 15 minute break is well worth nurturing that child. And truly that is what is most important.
what an important reminder. & struggle that i'm comforted to know I don't face alone. There are only so many hours in a day and they should not be consumed by this!! the kids ARE more important. I have found, more and more, that expecting my children to participate in the chores is a big part of their learning responsibility. though, this can be inconvenient & seem like more work in the end. I have noticed Naomi learning to jump in un-asked...
hire a nanny and play with the kids all day. :)
Thanks for the reminder of what is really important. I agree it is hard to find that balance and I wish I knew the correct ratio! How are you doing? Wish we could get our families together sometime!
Rebekah
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